More and more people have been feeling it in recent years: they have lost themselves. They feel that something in their lives is not flowing, not simple, that there is a lack of joy, a lack of life.
Today, I will talk about the three reasons why people lose themselves, and maybe this applies to you.
- Family conditioning
- Societal rules
- Loss of true identity
1. Family Conditioning
You were born into a specific family, to two parents, with or without siblings.
This first family unit shaped you.
How? Through beliefs, injunctions, and fears that are inherited, generation after generation.
You know, for example, “we are all intellectuals in the family,” so you must be one too. If you love visual arts, heavens no, that’s not acceptable, you must toe the line!
Or, “there are only failed love stories in our family,” so you carry a heavy burden and see partners in a distorted way.
Or, “money is dirty / those who have money are dishonest,” so you will make sure not to succeed.
All these beliefs, all these injunctions, all these fears, whether conscious or unconscious, taught you how to love yourself and others. They taught you to define yourself within a family mold, a mold that is itself defined economically and socially in society.
You defined yourself with your family or against your family, which is also possible.
What is certain is that your family was the benchmark model: do you follow us, or do you stray from us?
And often, even if we stray, we still seek love and recognition from our family, and the bond can be hard to maintain.
The relational dynamics with your parents, the way your parents loved each other (or not), your relationship with your siblings, all these form your first vision of the world. You wear glasses and see the world through this prism, your prism, and you think it’s real when it is entirely subjective.
At the same event, two people will have different interpretations because they do not have the same family conditioning. Does this mean one reality is more real than the other? Absolutely not! Each person comes with their baggage, their experience, their interpretation.
Then there are other family units, those more distant, like cousins, uncles, aunts, grandparents, who leave an imprint on you.
Your family gives you your identity in this world, and you will have an ego, a personality that will emerge from this mold to live in the world.
2. Societal Rules
Let’s talk straight. Society keeps telling us what we should do. What’s “good” and what’s “not good.” And this starts from the earliest years of our lives.
We go to public school, we are given an education, we ingest lessons chosen in a specific manner (yes, there are entire aspects of human life not taught in school, and often the State gives its version of historical facts, which should indeed be subject to debate).
We are shaped to be citizens who will then fit into society’s mold, pay taxes, follow the daily grind, then retire.
From our birth, we enter a tunnel to fit into a society that does not consider everyone’s needs! If you are unfortunate enough not to follow the given pace and model, then things will be more complicated socially (that’s what we were made to believe).
Not everyone is made for scientific subjects, for example, which are held as the Holy Grail. Not everyone is made for marital life, children, the house, the car, and the dog. This is very cliché, obviously, it’s done on purpose, but you get the idea.
We are conditioned to follow a way of thinking, to march in step, not to question the system too much, not to see beyond.
3. The Loss of Your True Identity
You have understood: you are the product of your family conditioning and your societal conditioning.
It takes self-work to peel away, like the layers of an onion, what does not belong to you.
Who are you? Simply the daughter of your mother and father? The sister of your brother, your sister? The mother? The wife? A birth date, a social security number, and a bank account number? A postal address? Qualities, faults? A social status? The amount in your bank account?
Who are you?
You are not who you think you are. You are not just a body. You are not (insert information) first name + last name + date of birth + place of birth + country of birth, as indicated on your identity card.
You are lost, like many people, because you believe this, this limited vision of yourself.
You are a Soul. A Soul incarnated in a body. To have experiences. To evolve on your path. To grow. To return to yourself.
All this is an experience.
Your presence here on this Earth is an experience, and you have had countless experiences, not just on this planet.
So suddenly, reality seems less limited, doesn’t it?
Coming into this world, having experiences, forgetting your true identity (otherwise, it’s not really a game, is it?), and having the joy of rediscovering it, by awakening, understanding the lessons, reconnecting consciously to your divine essence.
So yes, sorry, but your identity card limits you incredibly.
You feel lost because you have forgotten who you really are beyond your flesh and bone costume.
You are not here to be less than the luminous and unlimited version of yourself.
You are not here to suffer.
You are not here to waste your time.
You are here to bring the color, the vibration of your unique Soul to the world, and now consciously.
Consciousness means paying special attention to our thoughts, our ways of functioning, our words, our feelings, our actions to EMBODY our divine nature!
Quite a program, don’t you think?
If what I share with you in this article speaks to you, resonates with you, then I invite you to continue this exchange by subscribing to my newsletter below or through my contact form.
Warmly,
Jocelyne
